I just can't stop laughing!

The following was a conversation that still has me laughing. I just had to share.

Josie: "Dad! Brandon said Bah-bah-goo-bah!"
Dad: "Well, tell him Flibbidygoush."
Josie (to Brandon): "Flibbidygoush!"
Brandon: "Ooooo, that's a baaad wooord!"

*Seriously those were the words they used!

Blooming where I've been planted

When we made the decision to move to Roswell, I'll admit I was scared. I believe I even blogged about my fear. Today I rejoice in the fact that it was a great decision. I have grown as a mother, wife, and most recently as myself in the year and a half that we have been here.

I'm more confident in mothering because I'm not constantly worried about if my mom would've done something different knowing she'll hear about it when the kids arrive at her house after school. Not that I don't still have my mom's voice in the back of my mind giving advice, but I've been forced to make the decisions without her being only five minutes away to ask her advice. I've even managed to buy a few clothes without her opinion, something I hadn't really done since my internship in Florida back in '96! I've even cut my hair twice, dyed it once, and made my first purse purchase without asking my mom to go with me and give her opinion. Believe me folks when I say that's a BIG deal.

My new role as wife isn't too much different now than what it was before I made Daddy an honest man. "Discussions" are fewer but tend to be more intense as we continue to learn each other. I'm trying to make sure my husband knows I love him and how proud of him I am for his accomplishments. It isn't easy as he tends to be terribly hard on himself and takes any downfall personally. His moods, depression, anger at himself and misdirection of frustration can be very trying. Being the shield between him and the children at those times really takes a toll on me, both in heart and energy. He also gets very frustrated waiting for answers about my health from my doctors, but we've found one who shares his frustration because HIS wife is going through a similar lack of diagnosis. Daddy seems to be more patient, though I do have to remind him not to take out his frustrations on the children. He really is a better parent than when we first began this journey.

I have made my return to the theatre! Woo Hoo! It has been nine years since the last production I've been in. That is unless you count my continuous role of "mom" in the production called "Parenting, or How Nurturing a Parasitic Organism for 9 Months can lead to Insanity." The Roswell Community Little Theatre is producing "The Money in Uncle George's Suitcase" and I play one of his nieces who is a bit of a snob (so unlike me) who, with her con-artist husband and most of the other family members, turns into a money hungry monster. I'm having a blast in rehearsals. Last week we rehearsed the scene where I've fallen into a tub of earthworms and come running on stage screaming! Last night was the scene where I'm swallowed by the couch! Once I have my lines memorized, I'll be able to work on the dramatics more. The rest of the cast is wonderful, so many different, fun, friendly people. Our director and another lady are in The Enchanters ladies choir and asked me to join.

The Enchanters sing a'capella harmony and I have been welcomed with open arms. Excepting, perhaps, the director's daughter, I'm the youngest person there... and I'm 35! The Enchanters have been around for 30 years and several of the ladies have been there for the entire history. I love to be there watching and listening to the group harass and chide each other like old friends do. They are all of an age where they just tell it like it is but no one's feelings get hurt. My sides still hurt from laughing so much Monday night!

From on the heels of the invite from The Enchanters.... I was asked this past Sunday to join the choir at our church. When I was 18, my confirmation teacher told me that my talents were a gift from God and that it is only right to give back to God and his church. So how do you tell the church that you can't because you're too busy with other things? YOU DON'T! While I really can't take another evening rehearsal because that would be very unfair to Daddy, they did let me know that I could come to rehearse the hour before church. Since I'm already going to be there for church, being there an hour earlier is not a problem. Even better? I can bring the girls with me since they are all fledgling vocalists themselves! So that only leaves Daddy with our son to wrangle in the pew on Sundays.
Roswell, New Mexico..... I think I've found my place in the world.

Getting Ready or Things I'd Rather Do Than Have the Flu!

Fast approaching is my favorite time of the year, the annual trinity of companionship and fun. Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. And there is nothing in this world that prepares me better for this season than a drive through wooded mountains through the falling reds and golds of autumn leaves. This past Sunday I got to do just that. I almost felt like I was in a commercial for some new sports car - granted it took alot of imagination since I drive a mini van. But it is red, so at least I didn't have to imagine the color.
My drive Sunday led me to my parents' house to visit with my brother, his beautiful wife, and my precious little neice. She had her first birthday party on Saturday which we, very unfortunately, had to miss because of monetary reasons due to my having been sick the previous two weeks. More on that later. It was a grand affair including clowns (my brother and his wife), costumed children, a pinata bigger than my youngest two children together, jumping balloons, and cotton candy! I would've loved to go and my brother and his wife were sorely disappointed that we could not attend, though they did understand why. So, in true loving brother manner (even if he won't admit it), my brother offered to meet at our parents' place with cotton candy machine in tow and even assist with our gas costs to get there. With my parents' home only 2.5 hours drive (5 hrs total) instead of the 4 hour drive (8 hrs total) to my brother's place, we were able to meet them after a little shuffling around of the financial picture and catching two errors in Daddy's balancing of the checkbook. We were up to our eyeballs in sugary goodness - cotton candy, cake, popcorn balls (my favorite!!! You did hear that Crystal, right?), cookies, and rice crispy treats! Yum! I think I managed to gain back all that weight I lost when I was sick! Best of all, baby Kate loved her present!
This weekend is our annual Halloween Costume Party! I've got more decorations this year, a better idea of the menu, and some party games to play with prizes for the winners and costume contest. It's pretty exciting getting the house ready for the encore party to last year's that people are still talking about.
Thanksgiving this year will be at my home for the first time. This isn't to say I haven't made Thanksgiving dinner before. This is just the first time when my parents are coming to MY house. My mom is having surgery on her wrist and won't even be able to lift a pan, forget about a turkey. My dad is having a procedure done on his spine (ouch) and will be a little out of commission as well. So we'll bring them here to Alientown for a three legged turkey and green mashed potatoes! Just kidding! Traditional flair here with a couple of dishes made special for my mom who is watching her diet because of diabetes. In my book, there is no reason why she shouldn't enjoy the feast and still not worry about going over her limits.
Christmas will be with Nana Alice and the Greats in Phoenix! I'm so excited about visiting with them. I can't wait to play Perfect with the Greats until the wee hours of the morning! I want to gift them something special, but I'm unsure of what. Any ideas from the blog-o-sphere would be appreciated on gifts for a lovely retired couple.
The Dreaded Flu---
Luckily, I did not get the H1N1 or N1H1, whatever - swine flu. But this season's normal flu kicked my ass (sorry for those with tender ears/eyes but it really did)! I went to bed very early on the 12th and woke up at 4:30am with a fever and in pain all over! I called in to work and crawled back into bed after begging Daddy to just try to get me an appointment with ANYONE! Sleep was my body's friend. I was seen by a doctor by 9am. I had the flu which weaken my body so much I also got a bladder infection and strep throat - a triple whammy ala "mommy isn't home right now, please leave a message and if she's still living she hug you later, just keep away because she doesn't want to get you sick." I had so many antibiotics and medications that I couldn't stomach anything other than soup, noodles and ginger ale. I only made my return to beef a couple of days ago, the thought of hamburgers turns my stomach. This was, however, a prayer answered by God. The weekend before, BB had been very sick with a fever, headache, and her asthma was really bad - all the signs of swine flu which has killed several children in our town. As I held her in my bed to try to cool her body, I prayed to God to not have any of my babies be sick. I prayed that if anyone should be sick, let it be me because I didn't want to risk losing my babies. The next day, BB was better (her asthma still gave her fits all week) and I was sick. Thank you God! I tried to go back to work after two days and lasted just the day, going home to sleep the rest of the night and most of the next day. I went to Oktoberfest in Ruidoso and it wore me out again. I went again to work on Monday, only to be told to turn my hacking little self around and go home and sleep until I visited my doctor and got the okay to come back. I wasn't trying to get anyone sick (and no one did) but my doc had only given me two days off on the note to my boss. My boss said she didn't care what the doctor says, she would rather have me all the way rested and better than delay my recovery coming back to work not fully recovered. Have I mentioned I really love where I work! The toll on the checkbook was not pretty, nearly $200 worth of co-pays for medications and the two doctor visits (dr visits are only $10 so you can imagine the costs of the medications, glad I have insurance). This led to being unable to travel for my niece's first birthday party, but I am glad to have my health back. Now I'm just working on the stamina.
So if you haven't or don't usually get you flu shot, I highly recommend getting it/making an exception. If not for you, do it for your kids, it's no laughing matter. Besides, you want to be able to eat that "parental tax" from your kids goodie bag this Saturday. Happy Halloween!

Works For Me Wednesday

This is my first "Works For Me Wednesday" post. Hopefully, it won't be my last.

In my chosen profession, or rather the one I've fallen into but love it like I chose it, I have the opportunity to meet families of all sizes. Unfortunately, I also meet alot of harried moms and/or dads. Their common thread? They are trying to balance work and/or school and having multiple young children in the home. Many feel guilty about not spending as much time with their children as they think they need to. With each of them, I share what has worked for me with my four little ones (with a try at #5 next year).

Every workday morning, Daddy wakes me up at 5:30. That may be too early for some, but just try waking 30 minutes earlier than you would normally need to. I put on my robe and walk to the couch where I have a few sips from my coffee. I snuggle with Daddy for five to ten minutes. Then I wake the children. I then take turns snuggling each child for about five minutes. I ask them if the slept well, what dreams did they have, what are they looking forward to today? Then I send them off to get dressed and ready for school or camp. Each child gets individual time with me and starts everyday with a long hug and knowing that we love them. This works for my 12 year old all the way to my 3 year old, they know I love them even though I can't spend as much time as I want to with them. We're going for quality here because quantity is something we really don't have much control over.
Hope this works for others like it has here with me and some of my families. Good Luck.

Ups, Downs, and All Arounds...

Definitions - Ups: that which I am happy or otherwise feeling well about; Downs: that which I am upset or angry or just plain frustrated about; All Arounds: as in where I have been this past weekend!
UPS: I am infinitely overjoyed at having all four of my children together again. While it was great having a honeymoon sans ninos, my house and my heart have been missing the chaos. My heart actually leaped at the mild banter between Lena and BB as they reasserted their place in the family ranks. My sweet BB has changed so much in the last two months. She has begun to "blossom" requiring the purchase of a few bras for her, heels and chocolate for me (this nine-year-old is taller than my eyebrows now). I believe that Brandon, especially, is grateful to have his sister back. I think he missed her most of all. I wish I had a great big beanbag to flop on with all my children on it to cuddle.
DOWNS: In retrieving BB from Texas, I was required to meet with my ex-husband, Jason and his wife Celeste. While I have lived a wonderful life without his presence, he feels the need as of late to try to cram himself into mine. Mostly I think his need to visit with BB only came about when I got engaged to Daddy and he realized that there was a far better man than him being the daddy for our little girl. Many people ask me if I wish he were dead for what he put me and BB through and I surprise them and say no. I agree that there were several incidents where one might wish he were dead, a few where if I had fought back it would have been self-defense, but as many who work with abused women know - I was fearful that any fighting would just be "kicking the beehive" for worse punishment. So there I was sitting in a Denny's on Fort Hood Road sipping on a root bear at 8am with my husband on one side and my ex-husband on the other listening to him and his wife argue in Spanish while his son played video games and BB got reacquainted with her sister, Lena. He promised BB that he would take her to Six Flags and Sea World, broken - they didn't go, which is why we were getting her Saturday morning instead of Sunday so that once again we could keep a promise made by the absent (-minded) parent. He promised that he would get her military ID renewed as it had expired a few months ago, broken - which will now require that I take an entire day off from work to travel 2.5 hours to the nearest military instillation, sit in line, explain for the up-teenth time that I have sole custody, show my wrinkled and dusty divorce papers, wait to be called up, get her picture taken, wait for it to be processed and then drive 2.5 hours back home. Oh! And that's after I wait for him to mail back the expired ID. She was wearing clothes that Jason bought for her which were too tight for my innocent baby to wear, but after seeing his wife I know why. Don't get me wrong, I don't really know the young lady and honestly she seemed nice enough. But her clothes looked like they were painted on because every roll showed and her pants left little to the imagination. If she'd been I guy, you would've been able to tell if he was circumcised or not! I'll admit I'm definitely no skinnie-minnie, but I do know what not to wear. If we were friends, I get an intervention from Stacy and Clinton on TLC for her. While I'm sure that no permanent damage has been done, it won't be easy to get BB to give up what little her father has given her. He was also very rude about why he bought clothes and tennis shoes for her, saying the items she came with (bought by my mom) were inappropriate to such an active girl. Really he could've just not said anything. There were other thing she did at which I am miffed, but I shall save them for an ex rant post. In any event, her visit is over and I don't foresee another one on the horizon after various misgivings on this visit.
AND ALL AROUND: I, and I'm sure Daddy, would love it if we could avoid spending anymore time in the car! We spent Thursday leaving from work to Grandma/Grandpa's to drop off B-Boy and Josie and then driving back. Return time - 11:30pm. Friday we left for Ft. Hood, Texas at 6:30pm right after work. A bad storm had us pulled over in a picnic area for an hour. We arrived in the Denny's parking lot at 5am Saturday morning. We discovered that having a van is a blessing on long trips by saving us from spending money on a hotel room which was only going to be used for two hours. We just pulled down the backseat into the floor storage, dropped down a thick comforter, placed two pillows and pulled a blanket over us - Instant Bed! After sleeping for an hour and a half, we woke, got dressed and went into Denny's for some breakfast. After byes, we drove to San Antonio for a day of fun (and rain) at Six Flags Fiesta Texas. Then we spent a pleasant night in our hotel room and left after breakfast to pick up Josie and B-Boy in Alamogordo. Finally we made it to our home in Roswell, NM just before midnight on Sunday.
A bit of a whirlwind excursion, but well worth it to have all my babies back home!

The Start of Something Big?

Here it is. No, this is not my wedding cake. I promise to blog about my wedding soon now that I have found a way to upload my pictures. This is the wedding cake I made for a dear friend of mine as her gift from me. This wedding cake was quoted to her by a bakery in our town at $700! So you could say I gave her a $700 gift (snicker with glee). I won't say this cake wasn't alot of work. It was. But it was also a joy which made it not seem like any work at all. It was also practice for a possible BIG venture. When I made my wedding cake, a beautiful but small one for my small wedding, I was immediately asked to make one for the young lady who caught my bouquet (her wedding was this morning and I'm delivering her cake this evening, pics to come). Upon my return from my honeymoon, another friend told me how beautiful my cake was and how did it taste. My reply was to bring her a sample of the cake. She loved it! So I was asked if I could make her cake and how much/what did she need to buy, she already had the stand you see here. I didn't ask her for anything, as my gift to her, I would purchase the necessary items. My payment came this past Saturday night at her reception.

My friend "S" didn't cry during her wedding. She didn't cry during the vows. She didn't cry during the kiss. She didn't even cry during the father-daughter dance. My friend "S" only cried when she took a look at her cake, gave me a big huge hug and told me "Thank you! It's so beautiful! I don't want to cut it!" Which, being the sentimental fool lately, turned on the taps to my own waterworks and we both had to grab napkins to avoid the raccoon-look that runny mascara would bring. That was my payment, the joy on my bride's face, and I will hold that in my heart forever.

Now the decision is on me to develop my own side endeavour of creating affordable wedding cakes. So far, I haven't done anything fancy. But they are beautiful and I am happy to do them. I have met a few people in the weeks since my wedding who are willing to help me advertise my own business of wedding cakes, I have only to create business cards and a web page of my work. It is something I can do on my own time, keeping the day-job I love, and I can schedule only as many cakes as I can do without overwhelming myself. With four kids, that's important. But most of all, it is something I can create and learn from, keeping my mind young and my fingers nimble.

Okay, I can't resist. Here are pics of my wedding cake (these are from my camera).

I loved the Cinderella carriage.

My ex-husband is a TURKEY!!!!!

My ex-husband has set a new definition for cruelty and pig-headed-ness. This afternoon I missed a phone call from my ex-husband's phone and then received the voice-mail. The timid voice on the line stated she was BB and she'd had an accident but it was taken care of, bye mom, I love you.
Naturally, my heart began pounding and the various mommy-versions of "accident" raced through my mind as I dialed my phone frantically to return the call.
My ex answered the phone:
Ex: "You didn't tell me about BB on long trips and needing to go to the bathroom!"
Me: "Um, that's every kid." (Especially knowing this was a 12 hour trip)
Ex: "Well, MY kid isn't like that!" (Hasn't he been pointing out BB is his kid?)
Me: "Okay, well let me talk to her."
Ex: "I already took care of it, twice!"
Me: "Just let me talk to her."
BB: "Hi, Mom." (Ex in the background telling her to tell me "what she did"
Me: "Hi baby, heard you had a potty accident."
BB: "Yes, twice. But we changed my clothes and I'm okay now."
Me: "Well remember, sweetie. This isn't Mommy and Daddy you're with. This "daddy" doesn't know you like we do. So if you have a drink, the next town you see, ask to empty out just in case because he's not going to remember to ask you if you have to go."
BB: "Okay mommy."
Me: "Okay BB, be safe, I love you."
BB: "I love you too mom!"
So here I sit fuming and contemplating running to Ft. Hood, Texas to get my little girl back from an asshole! Seriously! This crap coming from a man who has spent much less than the six years his son (not to mention the ten years his daughter) has been alive actually practicing parenthood! Your normal child will need the restroom eight to ten time in a 24 hour period if they are properly hydrated - less if they are sweating. In a 12 hour drive, this means at least 4 times. And what about the emotional damage for her? She's already feeling pretty embarrassed and upset about having the accident twice, then he's comparing her to his accident-free (and possibly dehydrated) six year old AND making her call her mother to admit her mistake so that he can somehow turn it into the mother's fault!?! Ugh! In my fuming, I completely forgot to ask BB what she had for breakfast. Because if he gave her regular milk with her cereal, that would be the reason for the bladder accidents, which is clearly typed out on the Medical Procedure handout I gave him with the power of attorney. I'll ask her tonight, because if that's the case, then he owes both of us a HUGE apology. I'm seriously doubting a second visit.